Are you waiting for God to bring that “soul mate” into your life? Are you waiting for that person so your “real life” can begin? It’s important to understand that Marriage for the believer, is not the goal of life. Jesus is.
That means that living a fulfilling life in Christ can lead you to marriage but it can also lead to experiences you would otherwise never have if you were married. Waiting is actually understanding that you are living right now, and every moment counts. You need to see that God has already brought purpose to your life while you feel you are waiting in your singleness.
Remember that life with God is about becoming everything that He has already purposed for you. When you doubt that and don’t live like that, it’s going to be very difficult to experience that, in your every day and for your future as well. Here are some ways that you can prepare yourself for the season of waiting and for your future relationship .
Invest in yourself right now. Build the future you want and know that God who is with you, is already creating it while you feel like nothing is happening.
Singleness Is A Gift
1 Corinthians 7:7 (ESV) I wish that all were as I myself am (Single & Celibate). But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.
1 Corinthians 7:32-35 (ESV) 32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord.33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
Take this time to focus on the Lord and live your life devoted, undistracted and free from the anxieties that come from being in a relationship. Marriage is hard work, not always, but often enough. It takes a lot of personal time, and dedication to constantly invest in it and see it flourish so the relationship doesn’t struggle. There are some really big responsibilities that come with marriage and having a family, in many ways life gets more complicated and more difficult to manage. So cherish your singleness while you can and use that time wisely.
Singleness Is Hard
Genesis 2 (ESV) 18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
This season of singleness that you are in right now. Is a season of temptation. It’s not just emotional temptation, it’s physical temptation as well. That’s why this time needs to be about developing discipline and exercising self-control. So you can learn how to fight the desires of the flesh with the Holy Spirit that Jesus has given you.
Now is the time to build boundaries, community and accountability. So you can be the healthiest version of yourself before someone comes into your life. Make your life rich and abundant with healthy friendships. Take on projects, activities, ministries and trips that make a difference in the life of others. Live your life preparing for what God is going to bring next into your life.
Singleness Is Preparedness
You don’t need someone to complete you. Jesus is the only one that can complete you. You need to discover for yourself what your identity in Christ is before someone can come into your life and possibly direct you away from that identity and purpose.
Too many people have sacrificed their greatness for God and settled for a relationship in the mundane instead. They did this not knowing who they were or what they were meant to do in the world. They were unprepared. Let your longings and desires lead you to Jesus where they can be best interpreted and discerned for your life today and for the future.
Being in a relationship with Jesus and serving others helps you to understand yourself, and prepare for the future God has for you in this life like nothing else can. What attributes do you possess? Where do you need the most work in your character and personality? What are the attributes you need to see in your future partner? What’s the vision you have of that life together? What are the values you are not willing to compromise on and need to have in common with them? The answers to these questions and others must be known.
Trust God that you are enough and that what is missing is your acceptance and understanding of what God is doing in your life today. Act and believe that this time will not be wasted waiting. That you are being shaped and molded by Jesus into living a life of fulfillment right now.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (ESV)
3 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
2 a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
3 a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.
This Scripture reminds us that God doesn’t waste a single season in your life and neither should you.